Causing me to resemble some deformed Star Trek mutant.

While rearranging our bedroom, I took it upon myself to personally tackle the nightstand.  I mean, I lug around a 20 pound baby boy all day everyday, surely I can handle a cheap piece of Target furniture.

Ha.

That nightstand whooped my butt.

First, I had forgotten that it was actually two cubes stacked on top of each other, barely attached.  I tried to rotate it by holding onto the top half, and I about twisted it right off onto my foot.

Having learned my lesson, I crouched down and attempted to rotate it by holding onto the bottom half.

At this point, the cheap little leg fell completely off and the whole thing fell right on my forehead.   The corner left quite the welt, which then continued to rise over the next two days until I started to wonder if maybe I had done some internal damage and perhaps it was my brain that was swelling.  Or maybe the swelling was inside my skull and pressing into my brain, which would eventually lead to my death.

Since I didn’t get around to taking a picture while the injury was in the height of its swelling (consumed as I was with my own mortality), I went ahead and altered a previous picture for you.  I think I did a pretty good job, what with my expert knowledge of shading and the airbrush feature on Paint.

You’ll just have to believe me when I say, “I looked just like that.”

And then, compare that realistic looking (really, it is) photo with this:

I totally could have been a distant cousin of this guy.