Bring your own water bottle.

Be seven months pregnant.

When the sweet old lady wearing the security jacket tells you that you’re not allowed to bring that inside, stare blankly and stutter a bit while pulling back your coat and placing a strategic hand on top of your bulging belly.

“Do you have a medical condition?” She asks sweetly.

“I’m… pregnant?”

“That’s a medical condition [smile], go on in.”

But then we went and spent that $5 on frozen custard and popcorn.

Mmmm…. frozen custard…